I stumbled across this article yesterday and was so saddened to read about the difficult decision shared by this father and his wife.

Reading about this couple’s experience made me think about the crazy ethical questions we’ve created for ourselves with our modern fertility practices.  By separating procreation from the marital embrace shared between husband and wife, through IVF and a variety of other practices, we’ve created “extra” embryos with whom we don’t quite know what to do.  Frozen babies.  Multiple babies in one womb.  Babies donated to research.

In the case of this couple, they became parents through the use of IVF and then, were delighted and frightened to learn that 4 of their 5 embryos had implanted in their mother’s womb.  They ultimately chose to abort 2 of their growing childern, and, as I read, I couldn’t help but feel so sad for the 2 children whose lives were spared.

Because, what if those twins-who-used-to-by-quadruplets will have to deal with emotional and psychological issues?  Will they feel subconscious guilt that their two siblings died so that they might live?  Will they feel some fear that, if they aren’t good enough, their parents might reject them, too?  Will they feel grief for the brother and sister they never knew?

I can’t imagine the difficulty of this couple, who joyfully awaits the birth of their twins, even as they grieve the loss of other twins.  How very confusing and sad.  Lord, help them, and Sts. Gianna Molla and Gerard Majella, pray for them.